Saturday, December 3, 2016

5 Reminders to Soothe New Relationship Anxiety

Credit: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/hard-to-trust-5-reminders-new-relationship-anxiety/
When It’s Hard to Trust: 5 Reminders to Soothe New Relationship Anxiety

“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” ~Ernest Hemingway
“I’m happy. That’s all you need to know.”

Pause before you react.

This is a hard one for me, but before you assume anything or unduly react to any type of perceived conflict, pause and reflect on where your thoughts and feelings are coming from. Could insecurity, fear, or trauma be at play? Is the conflict real or imagined? 

Being preoccupied is not the same as ignoring you. Making a lighthearted and harmless comment is not the same as intentionally trying to hurt your feelings. Showing frequent love and affection is not the same as using you for personal gain.

Separate your emotions from your ego, and consider the rationality of your behavior before you react or respond to anything.

Expectation is the root of all disappointment.

Keep your expectations in check. When a relationship goes south, we often tend to carry residual expectations and disappoints into the next one. If you experience disappointment over something your partner said or did, ask yourself what you expected them to say or do instead. Then consider whether or not that expectation is fair and justified.


For example, expecting your partner to listen to your concerns and honor your needs is fair.


Expecting them to read your mind, wait on you hand and foot, or make you the center of their world is not. Unfair expectations can poison a relationship if you don’t strive to recognize and release them.


Fix yourself before trying to fix your partner.

Be mindful of your tendency to project your flaws and insecurities onto your partner.


Projecting is a common mistake in many relationships because pointing the finger at the person closest to you is easier than turning it to yourself and being honest about whether or not your own internal dialogue is the actual source of the problem.


Before you decide to change something about your partner, consider what you might need to work on within yourself.


Trust is the glue that holds it all together.

I can’t even tell you how many times my partner has stressed the importance of trust after a misunderstanding or moment of doubt and insecurity on my end. Time and experience has taught me that trust is vital to the success of any relationship, but it’s something I clearly need to work on after years of being hurt and misled.


While trust may not be an easy thing for many couples, it helps to remember that if your partner is someone worth being with, they will never give you a reason not to trust them.

Friday, December 2, 2016

7 Inspirational Rules for Achieving Your Life Goals

Whether your definition of success is a happy marriage, a healthy bank account, or worldwide fame and adulation, we’re all motivated by ambition to some degree; the enduring question is “how do we achieve success?” The truth is, there’s no simple answer, but there are plenty of tips you can use to improve your chances of being successful in life. We’ve come up with a list of seven fantastic tips for achieving your life goals, as advocated by some of the world’s highest achievers.

1. Don’t let rejection stand in your way.

Harry Potter author JK Rowling is probably the most famous writer in the world, but if she hadn’t had the courage of her convictions early on in her career, things could have been very different. The Potter series has sold over 400 million copies worldwide since the first installment was released in 1997, but the global hit was rejected twelve times before a publisher agreed to take it. Even once it was released, it wasn’t plain sailing for Rowling — one of the first journalists ever to interview Rowling was given a first-edition copy, but thought nothing of throwing it in the trash; that copy would now fetch around £50,000 at auction! To quote Rowling herself, “Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged to.”

2. Invest in yourself.

As world-renowned businessman and philanthropist Warren Buffet once said, “the best investment you can make is in your own abilities.” By constantly working to improve yourself through the acquisition of relevant skills and information, you’ll be in a much better position to achieve what you want to achieve. Some of the world’s greatest sportsmen and women put their success down to their passion for self-improvement — and you only have to look at superstar footballer Cristiano Ronaldo for proof. Ronaldo may not be to everyone’s tastes, but he is one of the most dedicated athletes of all time, and regularly reaps the rewards of his efforts on the field.

3. Learn from your mistakes.

Along the path to success, there are bound to be a few bumps in the road — it’s important that you don’t let these setbacks slow you down. Every mistake you make is an opportunity to learn, and by recognizing and accepting your errors, you can ensure they don’t happen again, smoothing that path towards achievement. No less an authority than Einstein put it succinctly: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.”

4. Don’t be afraid of a little hard work.

If you want evidence in favor of this little bit of advice, look no further than Bill Gates, the creator of Windows and one of the world’s wealthiest business people. The Microsoft founder has always pushed the idea that success requires hard work, and once revealed that he didn’t take a single day off during his 20s, when he was getting the company off the ground. Quite simply, the more effort you put in, the more you’ll get out of it — as NFL icon Vince Lombardi famously stated, “The price of success is hard work.” It doesn’t get much simpler than that.

5. Dare to be exceptional.

Walt Disney knows a thing or two about living out fantasies, animating some of the world’s favorite fairy tales, so when he says “if you can dream it, you can do it,” it’s probably worth sitting up and taking note. Aiming low might reduce the possibility of making mistakes, but what great businessman or woman ever aimed low — if you’re passionate about a project and truly believe in it, there’s every reason to believe you can achieve your goals. You might even find that they’re closer than you think!

6. Be pro-active.

It’s probably no surprise that Richard Branson has a “get up and go” attitude — the man that created the Virgin conglomerate has delved into the worlds of business, music, media, and politics during his life, not to mention space travel, charity and the odd world record attempt. The billionaire entrepreneur has often cited this energetic take on life as key to his success, advising ambitious young people to “get out there and do things — don’t watch other people do things, and don’t watch television.” In the modern age, it’s all too easy to take a passive attitude towards life, but if you want to achieve big things, it’s best to have a hands-on approach.

7. Engage in your passions.

Ultimately, if you’re going to achieve great success in life, you’re going to need to care about what you’re doing — so if you’re an ambitious high-flyer who wants to go right to the very top, take a close look at the things that interest and excite you, and see if you can use that passion to achieve your goals. As the celebrated jazz singer and famed “First Lady of Song” Ella Fitzgerald once said, “Don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there’s love and inspiration, I don’t think you can go wrong.”
Credit: http://www.lifehack.org/417129/7-inspirational-rules-for-achieving-your-life-goals

Thursday, December 1, 2016

A List Of 30 Small Things For You To Do To Become Happier In Life

We all have desires, needs and wants. Most importantly all our pursuits amount to us being happy. Yet what is so central can be evasive to many. However chasing happiness should stem from the decisions and choices we make. Focus on the little things, as such is necessary, rather than the mighty actions you have to reach happiness. At the end of the day, happiness is never a destination but a journey and every step should be one where you embrace the excitement and joys life has to offer. Here is a list of 30 small things you can do to become happier in life.
  1. Be thankful and show gratitude. It is not about what you don’t have but about the things you currently have. Find a way to express your gratitude.
  2. Pursue the right career. Yes do something that combines work and fun in your life.
  3. Stop trying to be perfect. No one is.
  4. Learn to tolerate others. Just as you are not perfect, people around you also fall short of being perfect also.
  5. Don’t compare yourself with others. Rather always try to be a better version of yourself.
  6. Start each day with a smile.
  7. Dream and always hope for the best. There are no gains or successes in worrying after all.
  8. Forgive yourself and learn to forgive others.
  9. Give social media a break and learn to experience some me-time.
  10. Meditate.
  11. Give to someone in need. It doesn’t have to be money, but it could be your time or energy.
  12. You will always make mistakes, don’t ever take yourself too seriously.
  13. Listen or participate in interesting and thought provoking discussions.
  14. Be reasonable. Not everyone will accept your opinion or beliefs.
  15. Don’t try to win every argument.
  16. Set goals, they could be short term or long term. Just have something that you look forward to accomplishing.
  17. Exercise and try to keep fit. Your body is your vehicle to success.
  18. Celebrate your wins and embrace your losses in the same manner.
  19. Stop using negative words like “I can’t.” “I won’t.” “It can’t.” Always be positive and know that the world is a place of amazing possibilities.
  20. Write something. It could be a thank you note, or your plans for the future.
  21. Stop spending time with toxic people.
  22. Take risks. Learn to embrace your fears and face your challenges with bravado.
  23. Learn to let go of the things beyond your control. Life will always be unfair and will not take present itself the way we want it to. So value what you have and stop trying to hold on to the things that you cannot do anything about.
  24. Know your strengths and your flaws. At the end there is so much we can do or take. Know what applies to you and stop pushing yourself to places or borders that violates your values and desires.
  25. Embrace change. You should be flexible and be adaptable. Things will never stay the same. Time has a way of healing, building and reforming what is. So understand that things will pass. Rather than be a victim of change, be a master of it.
  26. Stop complaining and making excuses. Rather take on more responsibility and do more of what you can do to better a situation or the things that surround you.
  27. Eat right and sleep as much as you can. While people will tell you that less sleep, more work helps you reach your goals, understand that a healthy body is more vital to your success.
  28. Prioritize. You cannot chase everything at once. Rather pick those pursuits that matter to you and prioritize your goals.
  29. Stop being busy. Rather focus on being productive and appreciating the moments you have.
  30. Travel and gain new experiences. Who knows what awaits you on the other side.
Credit: http://www.lifehack.org/349565/list-30-small-things-for-you-become-happier-life